Everything my Specialists put into me, makes me very, very sick. I make progress, tiny progress, but then lose it all when they come up with another crazy drug trial.
And each time they are become more and more convinced that it will help me.
Because they are desperate to fix the unknown case that is me.
They have this stupid “we have to try everything” approach, but by everything that means every drug on the market, and they refuse to believe that maybe my body needs a moment to rest.
Almost a year of digestive medication after digestive medication, pain killers, antidepressants, antianxiety medication, supplements and now steroids.
I have not slept in five nights, am in excruciating stomach pain and have constant nausea and dizziness.
Symptoms that I was finally gaining control over.
I was eating meals independently, and am now eating zero. Bye-bye to my weight gain and positive thinking.
What if the answer is very simple?
What if I just need a month or two medication free to see how my body adjusts? I do not remember the last time I was drugfree, how sad.
How do you tell multiple Specialists that you do not want to be poked, prodded, used as a guinea pig anymore?
I do not want to be touched, in fear of you breaking me.