I Would Now Like To Feel Nothing.

I can’t sit here tonight and write an inspirational post about how things get better when you have Chronic Pain and Chronic Illness –
that your health journey is comprised of supportive Doctors and Specialists, positive thoughts, and constant love and concern from family and friends – not when I know in my heart that it would be a lie.

Just today.

Today, in this very moment, anything uplifting that I potentially write would be a massive lie.

Because,
in all honesty,
I would like nothing more than to leave this world ever so quietly tonight,
and judging by the severity of my symptoms this week,
I don’t think that anything anyone could say would convince me otherwise.

I just have to sit here and go through the exhausting motions of every single symptom,
stress,
thought and feeling,
even though I’d very much like to feel nothing.

Advertisements

19 comments

  1. I managed to do something to my back tonight, after writing tips to help ease pain flares in the winter… Now I feel like a fraud as I like in agony unsure of how I can sleep even on all the medication I can be on. I am desperately wanting to leave tonight too.
    We’ll just hang in there together, and go through the exhausting and agonizing motions of existence. Someday it’ll be worth it. Someday.

    Like

  2. Hey, I’ve just read a book called medical medium about chronic illness. I wonder if it will be off use to you. I’m following the plan as I believe that what he says is true. He’s a medical psychic and turns on its head current knowledge about chronic disease and provides natural solutions to overcome them. I really do recommend it though I’ve only just started his plan so can’t feed back a success story yet X

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I can’t say anything to make you feel better. I just want you to know that I have felt the same way many times. I just try to remind myself that tomorrow is another day, and hope it’s a better one. ❤️

    Like

  4. So many people would worry hearing words like this, but when you live if you gain a whole new perspective. There is no human way to experience this life and never have these crushing emotional moments. Just know you’re NOT alone.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s